We Must, We Must, We Must Learn to Love Our Bodies

Society tells women that if breasts are sexual, large breasts are even sexier and "good girls" should be prepared to minimize or suffer the consequences.

I have long been fascinated
with the way breasts are portrayed in the media. Breasts have
been coveted, mocked, scorned, lamented, examined, adjusted, lifted,
reduced, radiated, covered, enlarged and celebrated. When I flip
though the pages of fashion magazines I am greeted by advertisements
for miracle creams that will increase breast size or miraculous bras
that will give the appearance of a larger breast size. I can view
television segments about teen women who have been given breast implants
for their sixteenth birthday or featuring women who opted for breast
reduction surgery for health reasons. Through it all, breasts
are positioned as something separate from the individual they are attached
to. We’ve come a long way, baby, but
not far enough to shatter the glass bra of breast obsession.

Reading the teen favorite Are You There God?
Its Me, Margaret
,
by Judy Blume, I first encountered the notion that young women
were supposed to worry about their breast size. Margaret, the protagonist, fretted over her lack of development and devoted herself to breast enhancement exercises with the famous chant "I
must, I must, I must increase my bust!" Well, there was no room
for doubt. If I wanted to be seen as a maturing young woman then
I, too, needed to want to increase my bust. So I sat down and mimicked
the exercise described in the book every day for two months. It
wasn’t until I had the puberty talk with my mother that I realized
biology, and not those quirky stretches, had begun to work its magic
on my body.

But my breast awareness had really started years
earlier, when I was scolded for playing outside without a shirt on.
I was about four, it was summer and, for the first time, my mother
went ballistic over my shirtless frolic in the sprinkler. The
message was clear – boys could play without wearing shirts but girls had to hide
our bodies. The message expanded when I began to develop noticeable
breasts around the age of eleven.

I quickly learned that "good girls" wear bras so that
they don’t draw attention to their breasts and bad girls don’t.
Obviously, breasts were naughty and that idea took root when both my
female and male peers began to mock my changing body. So I dutifully
hooked on my first bra, un-tucked my shirt and tried to hide my growing
breasts.

Even as I struggled to come
to terms with my growing breast size, my favorite fashion magazines
instructed me in the rules surrounding breasts. Cleavage was enticing
when displayed on a date but inappropriate in a work-place setting.
Jiggling was funny and sagging was a sign that a woman was losing her
seductive appeal.

Somehow I emerged from my teens and learned
to love my body, which includes a DD cup size, but it was a long personal
journey won in spite of society’s breast obsession. So, when I came
across an article titled When Big Breasts
Are a Big Pain
, featuring the stories of a woman who had breast enhancement surgery
to create the largest breasts in Brazil, and of a woman who opted for
breast reduction surgery to address her physical pain associated with
large breasts, I wanted to scream.

Large breasts can result in
health problems. Back pain associated with large breasts is a
real medical concern, and many women struggle with it. But let’s
keep it real – the pain associated with large breasts isn’t always
physical. Society still sends out those negative messages to women
that breasts are sexual, large breasts are even sexier and "good
girls" should be prepared to minimize or suffer the consequences. Some women want
a larger breast size because they want to be "sexier" while other
women with large breasts long for reduction surgery because they have
had enough of being sexualized and told they should "celebrate" their large breasts. Lost in the conflict is a positive body image for many
of us.

For some the solution to the
body image problem is breast positive activism. The website GoTopless.org promotes the philosophy that a woman
has a constitutional right to go topless in the same public places as
men. The site calls for a national "go topless" protest day in August — though the movement may lose some of its credibility due to its affiliation with
the Raelian movement. GoTopless points out that women’s bodies are
seen as legally offensive or too provocative for public display while
men are free to waltz about topless in many public places.

Still, I prefer the body positive
approach of neo-soul singer Jill Scott who has partnered with Ashley
Stewart stores to design a new plus size bra line
. Scott provided designers with personal
feedback and insight during product development, instructing them on
the typical problems associated with finding a comfortable bra when
a woman is large of breast. The result is a much anticipated bra
line that features gel-padded shoulder straps and appropriate support
in fashionable designs that will hopefully go a long way towards alleviating
physical pain and a negative view of large breasts.

In the end no product can make
a woman celebrate her body any more than can the right to go topless anywhere. We must, we must, we must increase body positive messages
for all women so that breast reduction or enhancement surgery is an
individual decision and not an act of desperation.